Dear America,I never told you this, but I have this disease. You see, I’m a smart-ass. My parents aren’t thrilled about it. I remember the scoldings. I remember having to rewrite a 7th grade report on the Holy Grail because the version with jokes, I was told, was insensitive and, worst of all, earned an F. (The snark-less version earned an A, if you were wondering.) Fortunately, at the time my parents were too busy being divorced to pay enough attention to realize the danger my disease was putting my academic future in...
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