Friday, March 22, 2013

In the hypothetical office of a vasectomy joint..., pt. 02

There's also an old man in the (hypothetical) waiting room. He is doing some sort of low-growl/snore while he fills out his paperwork. Occasionally he says things aloud, minutes apart:


"...Jesus, Joseph, and Mary..."

And he just snorted, before going back to his growl.

"...I hope I have it here..."

I want to recommend an effective decongestant to him. I doubt he would take seriously my suggestion of a neti pot, though.

"...subscriber's name..."

"...don't know what tha fugg..."

"...oh nine..."

He's now on the second page.

It's also important that you readers realize that he is saying more words, but I cannot decipher them because of ...his growl?

"...gyooneedit... oh jeez..."

"...this is all a buncha fuggin' shit..."

He's at the window now. He spotted a cassette player behind the counter and got really excited about it. He says "gazette," though. He's offering to make her a bunch of gazettes of 50s rock n roll. He's seen all the original groups, except Elvis and The Beatles and the original Platters. He used to see 12 or 17 groups every Saturday night. He just finished telling several stories from the block, but I could not transcribe them all.  Sorry, readers. I did catch his story about Al Pacino coming to his block, and Al said something he didn't like, so the old man punched him. And Al said something else unlikeable, so the old man goes to punch Al Pacino again, but instead ends up punching a girl. And so the girl's brother go looking for him, but the old man had brothers, too, so he wasn't too worried. Anyway, Al Pacino never came back to the block after that.

(To be continued?)

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